The Loss of a Child

Two years ago this month, my then six-year-old son lost his best friend. Uchenna and his family had gone to Hawaii on what really was a dream holiday if you live in a grey, autumnal London, but while there, Uchenna – always a live wire fizzing with energy – slipped away. He was found, drowned in one of the hotel’s pools.

Uchenna and his sister on holiday in Hawaii

At his funeral, Uchenna’s mother read out this prayer:

Uchenna My Son
Who would have thought I’d stand here to say your days on this earth are done?
Uchenna my bright shining Star
So near in my heart, but now you must shine from afar
Ever playful, ever joyful, my Uche Boy
A true big brother,
Always most likely to give up your favourite toy
Gone but never forgotten

You’ll always shine on my son
You were heaven sent; a special one.
Now it’s time for us to say a fond farewell
Until we meet again in his kingdom where we all shall dwell
I’ll miss you, I love you
Uchenna My Son.If I could turn back the hands of time,
You’d be right here tightly in these arms of mine,
But it is not so and we must all accept
That a greater being than I has a purpose for you now
I know not where, or when or how
But I trust all will be revealed on that final day
When I will see you again and most surely say
I missed you, I love you
Uchenna, My Son.
In the two years since Uchenna’s death, his parents have displayed quite extraordinary faith and forbearance. Now, to help others who have suffered the loss of a child, Chioma (Uchenna’s mother) has set up a You Tube channel with her testimony to life after loss. You can see it here.
And there is a Facebook page for families who are grieving for lost children, here.


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