Me, me and, er, me

One look into the panic-stricken eyes of an author, pinned on the jacket of his latest book by a photographer, will reveal a simple truth: there is a reason he chose not to become an actor. Dear Reader, being married to a woman who used to be an actress and always, always, looks wonderful in photographs, I have come to appreciate that there is skill, art and knowledge involved in looking good on camera – I don’t think I would have paid Helena Christensen $10,000 to get out of bed, but a good model is certainly worth a reasonable fee.

We live in a visual age, however, and I am now being asked to provide photos – of me – for interviews and jacket covers. I decided, therefore, not to accept my usual photographic image as the human chipmunk and ask a good friend and fine photographer, Sarah Lim, to take some pictures of me that wouldn’t actually scare away readers. I think she has more than succeeded in that – the initial amazement (‘wow, I actually look pretty good’) has given way to unwonted and unwanted stirrings of vanity (‘maybe she could photoshop the spots’) – but now I have to decide which photo to use. In that, I ask your advice, dear reader. Which of these photos do you think is the best?

 

Timothy and the Animals

Timothy and the Animals is now available online, from the excellent On The Premises team. A taster:

Dear Mr. President/Prime Minister – please delete as applicable

(Timothy had seen this on a form once and thought it looked very official.)

I love animals, but we’ve only got cats and dogs round here, unless you count Megs and his gang. Please could you send me one of yours,

Your Friend,

Timothy.

PS. I promise to vote for you when I grow up.

PPS. And say nice things about you to the papers.

Growing Power

This is astonishing: we left a ball in the garden over the winter and a plant grew through it! We only realised what had happened when my son tried to pick up the ball and the plant came with it. Here’s the photographic evidence.

Hello and welcome

Greetings to everybody visiting my site – I take it the sudden spike is as a result of people reading The Dream of the Night-Shift Power Worker, yesterday’s emailed story from Daily Science Fiction. Thank you for reading the story; I hope you enjoyed it. I’ve had many other stories published, most of which can be read online via links found on my Stories page. Let me know what you think, either through a comment or by contacting me directly.

Rejection Notes – no.6 in a series

Sometimes, a good rejection can be almost as good as an acceptance. Editors, take note.

Dear Edoardo,

Thanks for giving us the opportunity to consider your story, “Immortal Longings.” After reading and discussing it, and then holding it for further consideration, we’ve decided to pass on it. It’s a charming read, but it will go right over the heads of our readers, as it did for half our editorial board.

Good luck placing this one elsewhere.